The Myth of Doing It All


Welcome to Day 13 of 31 Days of Mom Mojo – Tackling Time Management.

“Either you run the day or the day runs you.”   Jim Rohn

The idea that you can “do it all” is a myth.

Trying to “do it all” usually ends in doing many things poorly or rushing around so fast that you miss the joy in any of the doing.  Time management was never designed as a method to get you to work beyond your endurance to exhaustion, but it often feels that way, huh?

I hope the key message you are grabbing a hold of during this series is:

You will never do it all, but finding out what is truly important and making time for it is.

As I share with you tips on achieving goals, bagging non-productive habits and finding the bits of time to snag hold of, I want to make sure you are learning and not taking on feelings of guilt or shame because you feel inadequate.

That would NEVER be my goal or intent!  I wasd eeply touched by a note I received from a mom the other day where she shared how shedecided to leave the community of moms here at The Confident Mom because she felt judged and inadequate.  She felt I made everything seem so easy and if everyone did it just like me it would be just that – EASY.  OUCH!  It broke my heart.

Let me very clear about one thing – I am the first to admit I am a screw-up and do not do things right a good part of the time. 

But what I’ve learned from my MANY mistakes are things that I feel I can share in an authentic and genuine way as to encourage other moms who may feel beaten down and hopeless.    I know that I am in God’s will right now, sharing my story so that I can hopefully help another mom feel important, valued and truly HIS – just the way she is.

It was a good “check” for me to make sure I never come across like an “expert” – I am not, except for an expert in messing up, asking for forgiveness and thankfully getting grace and mercy from my family. I am glad this mom felt comfortable enough to share her feelings and I sent a note back to her with an apology.

So back to doing it all…….before any system can be helpful in your home and for your family, you need to admit you can’t do it all and you can’t do it like “Susan, The Confident Mom” or that supermom at your daughter’s school.

You are you and you know your family best and God gave you the intuition to make the right decisions and choices for you, if you allow Him to work with you.

The tips and what I share hopefully will merely help you to track, plan and evaluate your time use.  Get out of your mind the notion that you even need to “do it all”.   By the way, what is the “all”?

Finding a system that works for you is what matters.  Getting that Mom Mojo back means you can set reasonable goals that can be accomplished in a reasonable amount of time, take care of you and your family with less stress and anxiety, help your children learn cooperation and a feeling of being part of something beyond themselves and finding joy in the process.

If you are struggling in an area, just sit back and examine things.  Don’t just keep pushing yourself further and further into exhaustion. Before long, you are barely surviving on coffee, energy drinks and four hours sleep. That’s abusing time, not managing time.

You don’t get a second chance to use that time so think long about how you want to invest your time.  Remember our check-in about your thoughts on time?

Finding balance and prioritizing for you will not look like what it does for me, but hopefully you will gather some tips and strategies to help you find the system that works well for you during this particular season of life.  Because we all know, once we have it down it is not long before things change!

Do people think you do it all?

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  • Just wanted to say a BIG thank you for all of the work you put into this series. God is really highlighting a lot of the things that you are saying in a number of ways in my life this month. Thank you!!!

  • Danielle

    I just “caught up” with reading your series with a little down-time tonight. I am enjoying your writing & finding encouragement. Many of the habits I want to develop take time and as circumstances change, what worked well 6 months ago now needs to be tweaked or in some cases completely reworked from scratch to fit the needs of my family (which includes me!) as we are today. I have a 6, 4 & 1 year old and feel like I’m finally figuring out the rhythm of our weeks for the new school year – especially where naps, family time and mom’s project & refresh time fit in amidst 2 different drop-off & pick-up schedules.

    I have people ask “how do you do it all?” For me, it comes down to prioritizing the most important things and truly letting the small things go… Much time planning, organizing & then sometimes (oftentimes) winging it when plans fail… Squeezing in a “restful moment” here or there to breathe or say thank you for my life as messy & chaotic as it may be… And large doses of forgiveness and God’s grace every day.

    I feel like I was given the message “You can be/do whatever you want when you grow up.” I truly believe that, but I also believe not everything I want to do needs to be accomplished in this season of my life. I don’t have to do it all simultaneously.

  • You are so right to remember that different seasons require different time from you! Knowing what the small things are to let go is important!