Welcome to Day 14 of 31 Days of Mom Mojo – Tackling Time Management.
Don’t try and do everything yourself because you can’t. Anthea Turner
When the day seems to get out of your control early and steam roll over you for hours until you are completely exhausted, you are probably missing the five “D’s”. These can be difficult to begin yet liberating once you make this part of your regular daily routine.
I’ve mentioned them a bit before, but we are going to dive in a little bit further to examining each of them.
The five “D’s” are Do, Delegate, Defer, Dump and Distraction
Do
There will simply just be plenty of tasks that have your name on them and no one elses. These are tasks that you have to do yourself. But I caution you, really examine your tasks to see if someone else could do them. I struggled with this for a long time, and honestly still do, I would rather add a task to my list in order to have the task done “just so” This is a product of my perfectionism, which I am trying to overcome, slowly but surely.
Also, be careful here to not allow that dreaded procrastination to edge into your productive time. Stalling on those tasks that you need to do, only makes it worse. Be a woman of action rather than inaction.
Delegate
Delegating is a skill, did you realize this? Yet, once you learn this essential life skill, it can be one of the most beneficial ‘tools in your mom tool box’. Delegating does not mean to just off load tasks to others because you couldn’t be bothered doing it, or are unsure if you can.
Delegating is about helping others as well as yourself.
Helping others – by delegating we are actually telling others that we trust them. We are also allowing them to learn a new skill. Being a good Family Manager means you are always looking for ways to allow your family to work better as a team. Your family will gain a better understanding of how things are done as well as being part of the ‘team’. Some moms think they are doing their entire family a big favor by doing things for them and not burdening them with helping around the house. That is the farthest from the truth. Families that share household responsibilities are usually healthier and happier than families where one person (mainly mom) does all the work.
What do your kids actually learn when they help out? They are learning life skills, that if not taught in the home will likely leave them a little far behind. You’ve heard of the stories of kids going off to college not knowing how to put in a load of laundry or even scramble an egg. Along with those life skills you are teaching them responsibilities beyond themselves and collaboration skills. A feeling of unity also develops since everyone is contributing to the home.
One way I put this into practice in our home is a list I create Friday evening for a few tasks that I need help with around the house. These tasks can be anything from washing the car, emptying all the trash cans, folding laundry to sweeping the garage. If there are 6 tasks and three people eligible to help, then each person gets to pick two. Here is the catch though – they can look at the list Friday evening, but whoever is up first on Saturday and ready to start to work will get the first pick and they put their name on the two tasks they would like to do. So, whoever is the early bird gets to pick – and chances are they will pick the easiest, time friendly task or a task that they especially enjoy doing. This is a great way to get some cooperation!
Helping yourself – Once a task is delegated this frees you up to concentrate on the tasks at hand that you have to do. If you are finding it hard to ‘let go’ of tasks, for many reasons including the previous mentioned “perfectionism” issues try to think of the time you will be saving and not depriving others of your time. I often help myself overcome the anxiety that can accompany delegating with the fact that I will be more available to my kids and my husband if I do allow them to help. We can then do something a bit more fun, all together!
Do you still have things on your list? (Yes, I know that was a silly question!) Ask yourself, “What would happen if this were moved to a later time or scheduled farther in advance? ” Note this is an essential Do, Delegate and Defer question.
Defer
Not everything on your list is urgent. Be clear about what must be done today and what is not necessary. Where you get stuck is with tasks that are nice to do or useful to do but are really not necessary to do. Or they are not necessary to do at this time. I find myself doing tasks that I like to do perhaps even when they don’t necessarily have to be done today.
These could be your “want to do” tasks or even your “need to do”. Hopefully you’ve already conquered your “must-do” tasks but putting them on your list or delegating them. If your list is too long, you will have to evaluate your items and determine which can wait for another day.
Dump
When push comes to shove, there are probably some tasks that will end up just going to the wayside. I often have tasks that require time that I do not have in my day. For example, I would love to respond to every email I receive and I often push myself to do this, but when I look at my prioritized list, there is not time to allow me to do this on some days. I value family time and since an hour being present with my family or friends is more important – I dump.
Using the Dump technique will allow you to look at your day, the tasks set for you and all incoming requests of your time. Then decide what you really need to do
Distraction
This is a biggie – I can easily become distracted and get far off track! I have to intentionally be aware of the certain task I am setting out to do and stick to it. Just now, while writing this article I didn’t turn off my email notification and I’ve gone back and forth writing and checking emails that have come through. This wastes precious time – I could have had this article written 30 minutes ago and been on to something else!
Determine what tactics help you to stay on task. Is it setting a timer, closing the door or wearing ear plugs? Be cautious of the television, telephone and computer drawing you away from your more important duties!
Do you already put delegation into practice?
