There is truly something very special that happens in our hearts as we approach the holiday season – something that creates those ‘good’ feelings, reflecting on our blessings and how grateful we are. But for many, feelings of emptiness try to crowd out those ‘good’ feelings – we feel a sense of loss, grief of what could have been and often feelings we just can’t put a name on.
With so much written about being Thankful this day before Thanksgiving, I wanted to touch the hearts of those that may feel not so blessed, who might be struggling this time of year. We all have things to be thankful for, but acknowledging those places of struggle in our lives I feel is important instead of just brushing them over with what we ‘should’ be thinking.
The holidays are a hard time for me personally. Yes, I have my own list of what I am thankful for and what I cherish, but unfortunately for me my memories and how holidays play out for me is not of the Norman Rockwell pictures. My extended family is in discord right now, I do not see my father who lives 2 miles away or even my only brother who lives 6 miles away who is married and has 3 boys who I barely know. I lost my mother nearly 5 years ago, but unfortunately her last 20 years of her life prior to that was a mix of nursing homes, hospitals and battles being diagnosed with Mutliple Scelerosis. I can see her illness as part of the breakdown of our family. Her position, her role was important and she was unable to fill that spot due to limitations beyond her control.
As I reflect, I can see how truly important and powerful the role of “mother” is for a family unit, even more so outside the four walls of your own house. It is like mothers are the mortar of our families and we make up the bricks. God has given us an extremely powerful role and duty to provide stability for our families and a place to always belong. I can see how this extremely important mortar wasn’t there in my family of origin to keep us all solidified and we flail about now, struggling to pick up the pieces.
I share this bit of my personal story with you to encourage you and let you know that your role as a mother is so much more important than you know or will ever grasp. Our actions, words and the stability we bring will impact generations. So even as my heart aches for the ‘what if’s’, the ‘whys’ and ‘how comes’, I know that I must set the table for my family and be the mortar they need. So, if you are feeling the emptiness, I pray God shows you how truly important you are in His plan and He has not forgotten about you.
“Lord, You are my shield, my glory, and my only hope. You alone can lift my head.” Psalm 3:3
So as you get ready to gather around the table, however big or small that will be – know what you do in your home and what you provide is truly your best gift and I know will impact your family forever. Find ways to constantly be the mortar your family needs.
May God Bless you and your family this holiday season and beyond.
