Welcome to Day 11 of 31 Days of Mom Mojo – Tackling Time Management.
If you don’t know where you are going, you’ll end up someplace else. Yogi Berra
I’ve been in a quandary about where exactly to insert this particular topic into the series, so I just decided that today was the day. We’ve already talked about to-do lists, starting your morning right, and taking action rather than just complaining – so instead of continuing today with more focus on getting more done with different tips and strategies, I want you to decide what is really important to get done.
It’ time to get YOUR BIG picture!
As moms, we are focused on caring for others, we all know this – but sometimes we need to be reminded that we matter outside that role too. We’ve talked about this many times. We tend to lose focus on perhaps things that matter to us, personally. We know we want to care for our families ‘better’. Or learn better ways to parent different challenging situations, but what about you?
We have a tendency to do things that keep us from reaching towards the goals we would like to achieve. It is easier to do the mundane daily tasks than to push ourselves forward and challenge ourselves. It is easier because we feel less vulnerable to the possibility of failure.
I can get caught up in the daily tasks too and I often loose focus of my BIGGER vision, the BIG picture of who I am, who I would like to become and what my goals are. Feel familiar? Our actions can fall short and do not keep us moving forward toward the goals we have for ourselves – or maybe haven’t even given much thought to for a long time. So it is time to ask yourself…..
What do you really want?
When you find yourself yelling at the kids once again and feel the guilt rise….. what do you really want?
Your getting ready for bed and realize yet again, that you were unable to start that workout program you been meaning to do….. what do you really want instead?
Or you close your eyes when the alarm goes off at 5 AM and hit the snooze button…..what do you really want as your reality?
When you can answer this question, you can begin to set up some goals to get you on the right track to move toward that desired reality. It is all about taking action steps to get you there.
The first thing I suggest is to do a brain dump, take 15-30 minutes and write down everything that you can think of that has been whirling around in your mind about what you would like to change in yourself. Keep it in a realistic time frame, or you will completely overwhelm yourself. Pick a time frame of 3 – 6 months. Here are a few from my list: paint my family room, write a book, spend more individual time with each of my children, be proactive in planning date nights with my husband, learn better ways to care for myself when I have a Lupus flare-up and pray more consistently for my husband and children.
So grab a pen and paper and jot down your list.
The next step is to take a look at your list and break down the items. If you have done any goal setting before or helped your kids you are likely to be familiar with SMART goals. I shared this process in my Back 2 School Survival Guide for you to do with your kids. SMART stands for:
Specific
Measurable
Attainable
Realistic
Timely
Specific: A goal should state a specific action step rather than a vague intention. For example: “Spend 20 minutes of uninterrupted time with each child per day.” not “Spend more time with the kids”
Measurable: The benefits of achieving a goal should be easy measured. For example, one of my goals is to be proactive in planning date nights with my husband. That is a specific goal, and the benefits include: communicating more with my husband, sharing time alone together, drawing us closer, having a break from childcare duties, trying out a new activity together, and creating memories with just the two of us….and so on.
Attainable: A goal should be achievable given the time and resources you have. Be honest with yourself: if you are not likely to be successful in achieving a certain goal, then let go of it and set your sights on something else. If it just sits on your list and encumbers you, it does nothing put create negative feelings for you.
Realistic: A goal will certainly require hard work, commitment and dedication, but don’t set yourself up for failure by setting goals that you cannot realistically accomplish. Don’t let your hopes and expectations get in the way of you living your life – but also be careful to not go ‘easy’ on yourself. Pushing ourselves outside our comfort zone is often how God really wants to use us and creates an environment where we have to rely on Him.
Timely: Give each goal a deadline by which it should be completed/accomplished (if applicable). Some goals are on-going, in which case you can re-evaluate your progress at different set times, 2 months, 4 months, etc. (i.e., Spending time with my kids)
So for today, do that brain dump! Then pick a few off your list and apply the SMART principles in order to start taking action. As we journey through this series and learn more strategies for creating time for the things we really want to do, I hope you will see that you have the time to focus on things that matter to you personally and not just your duties as a wife, mom and family manager.
Take your new list of goals (or goal, and it is perfectly okay to just have one!!!) and post them somewhere you can continue to gauge your progress. You will want to re-evaluate your action steps to make sure you are moving forward.
Ladies, let’s get that Mojo back and move forward! It is not just about doing more and getting more done, it is about pushing ourselves into motion instead of just getting by each day – although, truth be told, I often have those days where I just get by!
Share one of your goals – I shared mine!
